i have been quite quiet lately.
it's not because i don't have much to say.
i was just not in the mood.
been busy as well, preparing for the wedding (mentally, physically, emotionally).
making my mind up bout my career.
spending time with mcdreamy, who just came back from the States.
just had a big "boo boo" with mrs mumsie.it was a bit of misunderstanding mixed with feeling of dissatisfaction and anger.
we were having a nice lunch in gardens, mid valley.
then, walked in lina teoh.
a long time ago (like 10 years ago), someone said that our smiles were similar. and so, i told mrs mumsie. then suddenly, the conversation turned sour!
"you? smile? you don't smile! in fact, you are always frowning and garang (fierce). you have a very unpleasant character"
i was a bit shocked at this. in my defence, sometimes i can be a bit fierce...but only with my little brother, who kinda NEEDS it?! and sometimes, who wants to smile when you come back from a stressful day at work!?
but other than that, i have done nothing but been a companion to her (and mr popsie). talking, chatting, joking, laughing. so how does this justify my "unpleasant character"??
if she told me that she thinks i shouldn't be so fierce to my little brother, things would have turned out differently. anyway, this has been a topic of discussion between my parents and i for the longest time. so why the personal attack!?
and i cried. right there in the restaurant. i couldn't help it! it's like everything i do will never be enough to her.
mr popsie came to my room after my outburst, and told me that sometimes people say the wrong things, but meant otherwise. and that i have to forgive her.
then, i went down to speak to her. and we had another argument. she said i am a very unpleasant person. *ouch*.
and i think i said some things too. i told her how she is also always unpleasant. never smiles. and whenever i try to be close to her, she pushes me away (literally). *sigh*. i never meant to say it out loud. but i was so angry.
she is still ignoring me. minimal contact. God...and i didn't even DO anything wrong!
it's like i am 15 all over again.
:(
1 comment:
hang in there yea girl, things will look up sooner than you think. wait til she cools down, then just act normally with her. i notice that moms can always find way to your weakest spot, but we hafta learn to be a wall and let it bounce off us. take care dear :)
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