the happening

is not so happening...

went to watch this on friday with mcdreamy. i really wanted to watch kung fu panda, but it was sold out. and this was the only decent movie (or so i thought!) available.

decked with my fave GSC light & sweet + salty popcorn, i prepared myself to be "scared"...cause to be honest, i am not very good with horror/thriller movies. i am actually the sort of person who hides behind any available cover up (e.g. pillow, pashmina shawl, etc.) during gory/scary scenes. so, with my heart beating...i set myself up for the worst.

Note: Please do not read on, if you don't want to be exposed to the movie spoiler. oh heck, just read on. cause i don't recommend u watch this movie...ANYWAY!

Note Note: Apologies to all M. Night Shyamalan fans. oh heck, screw you.

i think the movie is lacking...a climax! it was deadly monotonous (as monotonous as Mark Wahlberg's acting! sorry, he is only suitable in thug movies...or anywhere clad in his underwear).

it started off with a scene in central park, with lots of people walking about, doing whatever it is that people do in parks...

focus into 2 girls chatting on a bench. the wind blew. and suddenly, there were (unheard) screams. one of the girls turned to look.

"hey, those people look like they are scratching themselves!"

she looked at her friend, when she didn't hear a response. but, suddenly her friend said something that didn't make sense and slowly reached out for this chopstick hairpiece thingy and started stabbing her neck!

and that was it! that was the climax. from then on, this whole thing repeated in different areas of the America (where else).

and of course, the first speculation was a terrorist attack! which was later dismissed...because it didn't make sense.

mark wahlberg and wife (played by zooey deschanel, who was equally monotonous with an expressionless face) had some marital problems...because...get this. she lied to him and went out with her colleague, joey...to have tiramisu. how...treacherous! *gasp*...*roll eyes* wtf?!

then, there is john leguizamo, who i thought was an exceptional actor (at least in his previous movies, like romeo & juliet, moulin rouge, etc.). i think he pissed the director off. cause his character died off pretty early into the movie, leaving behind his daughter in the care of marky mark and wife.

so, it is really a movie about them going around...avoiding the "wind" which carries some toxin which causes the following:

1. incoherent speech

2. immobilisation

3. fatality - basically they find a way to kill themselves

along their "escape" to the south (or anywhere besides northwest), they met some other short-lived characters. there was this funny couple who were "running away" from said toxins...went back to their house...to grab hot dogs. because in the face of danger..hot dogs are very important.

the man HAPPENS to be a horticulturist (someone with extensive knowledge of plants). and i THINK mentioned the KEY thing in the movie.

"plants speak to each other. when threatened, they will excrete toxins...by causing weird chemical reactions. they react to human stimulus" - or something like that

so, using this piece of information (the guy died by the way), marky mark concluded that they have to move in small groups (because he observed that they only attack BIG groups). and he deducted this from a scientific thought process. something to do with..."create experiment, observe, yada yada yada)

oh, and you must also stay indoors and make sure that said toxin does not come in through any crevice or hole.

so, for the next 1 hour, it was really them running away from the "toxic wind".

pause: don't get it. if the trees are releasing toxins and "attacking" humans...how come the wind comes in at the right time??? can the trees ALSO communicate with the wind??

anyway. towards the end of the film...marky mark and wife kind of reconciled and "found their love". and yet, both are STILL expressionless. how passionate. no wonder wifey went for tiramisu with another man. or maybe its code for...having passionate sex. oh well...

and there was the part where wifey was in this small little house and he was in the big house (not far from each other). and it was connected by a pipe line. so, they can actually TALK to each other as if they are in the next room. then, just as he was about to give up...he said.."i am not going to die without you. i am going there"

so, he got out. walked to the little house. BECAUSE HE IS THE HERO, the wind was BLOWING FURIOUSLY. expecting him to just stop in his tracks and start the symptoms. but AGAIN...HE IS THE HERO. so of course that's not going to happen.

then, she came out, with the little girl (forgot about her)...and they walked towards each other.

yay! they were both (oops...i mean three) not infected.

"maybe, it ended before we came out". how convenient.

and that was that. then, on the news...this scientist professor guy was interviewed to give his opinion on what actually happened. he said "it's the trees! we are KILLING earth...and now Earth is KILLING US!" ok...i made that up. but it went something like that. but the host didn't agree. he was convinced that it were terrorist attacks. of course. paranoid americans.

then, 3 months later. it all started again. in france.

that was it.

blurgh.

out of 10...i give it a 2...for effort.

walked out of the cinema with a major headache.