something missing...

i am not sure if it is the year end...
or...
the crossroads of my life...in terms of my career & marriage...
but something is just not right.
this feeling of emptiness envelopes me.
it despairs me.

of late, i have been reminiscing of my student life in the U.K.
or the beginning of my career...where i used to be so passionate about work and the company.
and even the sweet blossomings of "first" love with mcdreamy.

life was so rosy.
life was a little bit easier.
was it?
or does it seem that way because...well, that's life? life is meant to get harder?

and so...here are some of the things i would like to have for the new year.

Family

i think i am ready. to start a family. to have a little baby.
of course ideally, mcdreamy and i would like to start having babies after next year. gives us time to travel and enjoy ourselves first.
however, i have no idea why...i have this sudden yearning.
yikes.

maybe it's all these pregnant women around me...or adorable nephews and nieces...
or maybe it's just in my head. i guess mcdreamy and i are just going to see how things goes.
if we do get pregnant, alhamdulillah.
if not, we will try again.

after all...practice makes perfect...no?

Career

ok, just ignore the pic on the right. i wanted to demonstrate a high-powered (yet fashionable!) career woman.

new organisation structure.
new bosses.
new team.

i need to step up my game.

my target is a promotion to Asst Manager by June 09. (yikes!)

this pretty much depends on my first goal too. because if i am "baking a bun in my oven"...i would need to consider next steps for my career. for example...

working from home?
change jobs, which allows me to work from home?
start my own business?

:p

Me, myself and i
this is easy.

a healthier me - less junk into my body
a slimmer me - which i am sure will happen if i kept to the first one
a happier me - i have to step up my solats again. i think i have alienate myself from God for far too long

i also want to start chilling out at home more with mcdreamy. reading books, cuddling on the sofa...

i am sure this pretty much covers all my new year's resolutions.
let's hope it works!